Doing the Right Thing When It's Hard

One of the most enjoyable movies I saw over the holidays was “The Descendants.”  George Clooney leads an excellent cast through a difficult story that showed some rare glimpses of a deep morality at the core of very-human people.

Clooney plays Matt King, a workaholic lawyer living in Hawaii. His lovely wife Liz has been left in a coma due to a tragic boating accident at the beginning of the film. As Matt struggles with his shock and grief over the approaching end of her life, he soon learns something more painful:  Liz was cheating on him when she was injured.  Matt is stunned, angry, and hurt.  He has a lot to sort out as he also tries to learn how to be a decent parent to his rebellious daughters.

Two scenes spoke to me very powerfully of people struggling to do the right thing when it’s hard.

In the first, Matt goes to visit Liz’s parents.  Liz’s angry father starts in berating Matt and praising his daughter.  The older man repeatedly sings the praises of Liz's faithfulness and attentiveness to Matt and their marriage; he repeatedly reproaches his son-in-law for being an absent workaholic. His diatribe intensifies. As an audience member you finally want Matt to say, “Oh yeah?  Well, let me tell you about your precious “faithful” daughter. You want Matt to set the old man straight.

But Matt doesn’t. He resists telling her father that Liz, in fact, wasn't nearly as faithful as he believes.  He bears the old man’s anger and reproach instead and does nothing to damage his love for his daughter.

In a separate scene, Julie Speers (the wife of the man Liz has been cheating with) comes to visit Liz in the hospital.  She brings flowers and wants to talk to Liz. With tears coming down her face, Julie says to the comatose Liz, "I forgive you. I'm angry, but I forgive you. I forgive you for sleeping with my husband. I forgive you for trying to break up my family. I should hate you, but I forgive you.”

In the book Julie’s speech comes across calmly, as you may have just read it, as serene and at peace.  In the movie, though, Julie seems to be raging against Liz even as she speaks her forgiveness. It’s obvious that she wants to forgive and knows she needs to forgive – but she’s fighting back her rage all the while she’s saying what she knows she has to say. It’s a powerful moment.

Liz’s selfish betrayal has exacted a terrible cost in human pain. But Matt and Julie show us two people with a moral center, each working hard to be a decent and loving human being, each trying to take “the high road” in the face of anger and pain.

Bearing unjust accusations and staying silent.  Speaking forgiveness at the hardest moments. Resisting the temptation into vengeance and retribution. Staying true to one’s core beliefs. These elements ought to be familiar to anyone of us who knows the story of God’s dealings with us.  We find parallels in the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Wouldn’t you like to have the strength to do the right thing?  Even when it’s hard? 

See you in church.
              Pastor Larry